"I'll have to say I love you in a song"
    by Sara Jaye
        SaraJNES@aol.com

    Wow, who'd have thought my first ever CCS fic would be a songfic? :P But
that's what it is. In honor of Valentine's Day, I decided to make my writing
debut with a short, sweet little songfic. It's a Sakura/Tomoyo story *ducks
flames from Sakura/Syaoran fans*, and it's mostly from Tomoyo's point of
view. Well, the song is at least, until the last few lines. After that, it
switches to Sakura's. Parts from Tomoyo's point of view are encased in
{}'s.
    I used the song "I'll have to say I love you in a song", by Jim Croce.
Sorry if it's such an obscure one. ^^; I just thought it fit rather well.
    All lyrics are encased in *'s.
    I've never really seen CCS before, and only know a little about the
manga. So I'm not sure of the time period the storyline covers. In this
story, Sakura and Tomoyo are 13, but Syaoran and Sakura are (supposedly)
falling for one another. So if I got any timeline or story elements wrong,
please let me know.
    Anyways, I think that's enough for the author's notes, ne? :P Now, on
with the story! ^_^


[Disclaimers: CCS, Sakura, Tomoyo, and Syaoran are not mine, the belong to
CLAMP. This story is for entertainment purposes, so please don't sue me.
"I'll have to say I love you in a song" is the property of the late, great
Jim Croce.
This is a yuri fanfiction, meaning love between 2 girls. If you are either
(a) homophobic and offended/bothered by this kind of thing or (b) a
Sakura/Syaoran fan, I suggest you leave now, as you will definitely not like
this. If you read this and are outraged/disturbed/etc, please do not blame
me. :P But if none of the above apply to you, enjoy! ^_^]

                ~

*Well, I know it's kind of late,
I hope I didn't wake you.*

    {I hate to call this late. I know you're probably asleep and would hate
to disturb you or anyone else in the house. So if I did, gomen nasai.}

*But what I got to say can't wait,
I know you'd understand.*

    {I just really needed to tell you this. It's been driving me crazy for
the longest time and if I put it off any longer, it's sure to kill me. But
you'll probably understand. You've always been so sweet...among many other
things.}

*Every time I tried to tell you
The words just came out wrong.*

    {I've tried to say this to you several times, but no matter how hard I
tried, the words always got caught in my throat. And when I did manage to say
something, it always came out wrong, like "I love that color on you", or
"You're very important to me". Even if those things are true...they're not
what I wanted to say.}

*So I'll have to say I love you in a song.*

    {What I'm trying to say, and what I've been trying to say for all this
time is...I love you, Sakura-chan. I always have, and I always will.}

*Yeah, I know it's kind of strange,
But every time I'm near you,
I just run out of things to say.*

    {It's so strange. I'm usually so cheerful and talkative around people,
and you've always been the shy one. Yet every time we're together, this shy,
awkward feeling comes over me and I get so...tongue-tied. I don't know what
to say...}

*I know you'd understand.*

    {So you'll probably understand what I'm saying...or at least I hope.}

*Every time I tried to tell you
The words just came out wrong.
So I'll have to say I love you in a song.*

    {People always say that it's better to confess something like this in
person. But since I obviously can't do that, I've got to tell you over the
phone. In this message. I just hope nobody else hears this before you do,
Sakura.}

*(Guitar solo)*

    {I can't believe it's come down to this, though...having to tell you my
true feelings in an answering machine message. Were the little messages I've
been sending for awhile not getting through? If that's the case...I'm not
surprised. I love you more than life itself, and I hate to say anything
negative about you...but you can be so dense sometimes, Sakura-chan. I know
you've got other important things to worry about, but still...*sigh* Maybe
it's my fault...maybe I'm being too subtle.
    And the sad thing is...even if you had been able to pick up on the hints,
I know you couldn't feel the same way towards me as I feel towards you. I
know you already have someone...I know you're slowly falling in love with
Syaoran. But that is okay. I want you to be happy above all else, and if he
makes you happy, then I hope you 2 get together. I want only the best for
you, Sakura-chan. You deserve it.}

*Every time the time was right,
All the words just came out wrong.*

    {*sigh* Even when the moment was just perfect, I always managed to
freeze...or he came by...sometimes I feel so frustrated. Why does something
that should be as simple as this have to be so hard to say? Why?}

*So I'll have to say I love you in a song.*

    {As long as you get this message, I'll be satisfied. I just hope...you
don't feel any differently towards me...}

*Yeah, I know it's kind of late,
I hope I didn't wake you.*

    {Again, if I woke you or your family, gomen nasai. I'll go
now...Goodnight, Sakura-chan. Sleep well. *voice breaks a little* I love you.
*hangs up*}

*But there's something that I just got to say.
I know you'd understand.*

    I sneak dowstairs to the answering machine. I could've sworn Tomoyo just
left me a message...but why? Could I just be imagining things? I walk to the
table where the machine rests, and the light is flashing. Someone did leave a
message. I press the "Play" button and listen.

*Every time I tried to tell you
The words just came out wrong.
So I'll have to say I love you in a song.*

    By the time the message is over, I can't even blink. Did I actually hear
this? Tomoyo loves me? I must be dreaming...I pinch myself just to be
sure...this seems so unreal.
    "Ow!" I wince. I'm not dreaming. And now I feel guilty, rather stupid,
and relieved. She does love me...
    I can't say that I was wishing the exact same thing the whole time. Until
recently, I only thought of her as my best friend. But lately, I'd been
noticing her in a different light...for the first time, I'm seeing just how
wonderful she really is...how beautiful she looks, especially in the
moonlight on a clear, starry night. And just how much she means to me. But
I've also had feelings for Syaoran, so I was confused.
    'Not anymore,' I think. Quietly, I go back up to my room. I slip on my
shoes and jacket, then open the window and climb out. For a minute I consider
using the power of the Clow cards and flying to her house, but decide not to.
It'd be too risky. Shivering, I quickly walk to Tomoyo's house.

    Standing outside, I gaze into her window. It's dark, and the blinds are
drawn almost all the way. She's probably asleep...I consider going back and
just leaving her a message. 'No,' I tell myself. 'You owe it to both her and
yourself to tell her in person.' I sigh, then pick up a tiny pebble and throw
it up at her window, hoping not to wake her mother or her bodyguards. As I
see her get out of bed and walk to the window, I feel my heart pounding in my
chest. 'Please understand, Tomoyo-chan,' I pray.
    "Sakura-chan?" she yawns, rubbing her eyes and looking very surprised to
see me. "Hi...can I talk to you?" I ask shyly. She nods, tossing a rope out
the window. I climb up as fast as I can, then practically fall into the room,
shivering.
    "You must be freezing," she says sympathetically, and wraps a blanket
around my shoulders. "Thanks," I whisper. She smiles. "No problem," she says,
settling down next to me on the bed. The next few minutes are silent.
    "What did you want to talk to me about?" she asks. I take a deep breath,
then look at her. "I got your message." She blushes, and almost looks
panicked.
    "You did?" she nearly cries out. I nod. "I see..." She looks down.
    "And?"
    "And...now I understand. And I'm very sorry for not seeing it
before...for not picking up on your hints, and for not realizing I felt the
same way." She blinks.
    "You mean...?" I nod. My heart beats faster, and I can barely get the
words out. But somehow, I manage.
    "Aishiteru, Tomoyo-chan," I whispered. For a minute, she doesn't answer.
Then she turns to me, her eyes shiny and that beautiful smile spreading
across her face.
    "Sakura-chan..." she whispers. Several tears of joy run down her cheeks.
I reach up and gently brush them away with my fingertips, then take her in my
arms. "I-I just can't believe this...I never thought you could feel the same
way," she chokes. I look into her eyes, my own sparkling with happiness.
    "I only wish I'd known my own feelings sooner," I whisper. She smiles and
snuggles closer.
    "It's okay. I'm just happy I finally told you," she sighs. "I love you so
much...finding out you feel the same way is just...more than I ever dreamed
possible." Then she looked a little concerned. "What about Syaoran?" she
asked.
    "He's just a good friend. I thought I loved him, but it was only a
schoolgirl crush," I told her. We gaze into each other's eyes. She wraps her
arms around my chest, looking deliriously happy.
    "I love you, Sakura-chan," she whispers.
    "And I love you." I lean my head in slightly, as does she. Our eyes
close, and our lips slowly meet.

                ~End~

    Wow, that was a bit longer than I expected! ^^ But it was pretty damn fun
to write. Sakura and Tomoyo are just too cute. ^-^
Well, that's all for now. I dunno when I'll actually write my next CCS fic,
but I hope I can soon. ^^
    Till then, ja ne! ^_^